More delays..

My infertility doctor called on Monday. She said she had my pathology results from the hysteroscopy two weeks ago. I wasn't even aware that she'd taken samples.

Anyway, the tissue she found was indeed placenta so no surprise there. But she also said that there was evidence of inflammation. I guess this will have been caused by the placental tissue.

She said she wants to do an endometrial biopsy sample for my next cycle so that she can be certain that things have settled down and the inflammation is gone. If it hasn't, then we have to wait until everything is fine before we go ahead with the next frozen cycle.

Needless to say, this news was a real blow. I'm now more certain than ever that all these issues will have interfered with the first frozen cycle. We will never know if that embryo had the potential to become a baby, but if it did, it really didn't stand a chance.

I've done well trying to look forwards and not backwards but its hard not to wonder if we have lost our only chance to have another baby. And I'm now absolutely resolute that I want to have all my future ultrasounds done by the sonographers and not the nurses.

To avoid the conflict that demanding this might mean, I've decided to go for my blood tests and ultrasounds at another clinic nearer home. That will mean the sonographers have to do the scans. In some ways it will be more convenient anyway, so it should be a good option.

So now we are yet again waiting, waiting, waiting for AF to arrive. Dr D seemed to think it would start soon after the hysteroscopy but two weeks later and I'm still waiting. It might be that once I stopped the oestrogen tablets, I need to go back to zero and have a full month before my period comes.

In any case, I won't be doing a pregnancy test until at least four weeks after I stopped the tabs. It really looks like we won't be done with IVF for some time yet. I had thought that it would all be over, one way or another, before christmas but I think things might drag on into next year.

And I'm focusing more and more now on a future without a second child. I've been thinking about where my career is going and what I want to do with it in the next couple of years. I think that's a good sign that I'm moving on. And who knows, maybe we will have baby number two but if not, I'm starting to come to terms with it.