What happened was, we were in a shop yesterday morning. Zoe was in her car capsule and I had taken it from the car and put it in the pram as I always do when we go shopping. For some reason, I put it in facing forwards, which was a bad mistake.
Anyway, the shop we were in had three steps leading out of the shop. I checked she was tightly strapped in and I knew I had locked the capsule in place. Anyway, as I was maneuvering the pram down the stairs, I must have tipped it too far forward, and the capsule just popped out and rolled onto the floor with Zoe in it.
I just couldn't believe it had happened. After a split second she started crying, and LH turned the capsule back up and got her out really fast. She was crying loudly but didn't appear to be hurt.
Anyway, we got her out of the shop and back into the car and headed home. I was really just in shock that the capsule had come loose from the pram. I really thought once it was locked in, it wouldn't come out.
When I went to take her out of the car, I noticed that she had a small bump on her forehead. So we decided we needed to go straight to the children's hospital emergency to have her checked out. I went and got her bottles and solid food before we headed off.
All the while, she did seem like her normal self so we weren't too worried, but a bump on the head of someone so small was really scary. The triage nurse checked her and said she looked fine and we sat down to wait for a doctor.
After about an hour, we were seen by the doctor, who checked her eyes, reflexes, and head movement. Everything was fine. She asked had she vomited and of course, the answer was yes because she vomits all the time after her meals so that's nothing unusual. Apparently, its one of the things they look for when there's a head injury.
We then waited another 2 hours since they like to observe them for the first 4 hours after a head injury as that's when most bad reactions will happen. Anyway, she continued to be fine and really was just her normal lovely self.
So it all ended ok, but I just felt incredibly bad that it had happened at all. I just felt that if I'd been more careful about taking the pram down the stairs, it never would have happened. I should have kept the front wheels high and the back wheels low to stop it tipping forward. I should also not have put the capsule in facing forwards and I've never done it before. I don't know why I did it that way yesterday. We also thought about how tragic it could have been if she'd injured herself more seriously.
LH said he thought she was dead in the split second before we heard her cry.
I just feel so sad and sorry that it happened and the guilt is awful. I wonder if I'm too careless with her and I don't think carefully enough about her safety. Its just such an awful feeling. I guess I am going to feel like that every time she has an accident until she's an adult and perhaps its natural for mothers to blame themselves.
We realised that its probably not the first time we will have to take her to the children's emergency department, if for no other reason than sporting accidents. The place was teeming with junior rugby and netball players with broken bits.
LH was really shaken up by the whole thing, although he wasn't angry with me. I was pretty unhappy with myself though. I guess we just need to move on, and I need to be much more careful in future.
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