'A very difficult problem'

'A very difficult problem' - that's what Dr G had to say about my situation. This morning I finally called Dr D again to see if I could get some answers. I was so sick and stressed out with waiting, I just couldn't cope with it any more.

Fortunately, this time I got some action. She called this afternoon to talk things through. In the opinion of Dr G who did the last hysteroscopy, the only thing I can do now is wait for a couple of cycles to see if the problem of the placental tissue in the uterus resolves itself.

Needless to say, this was pretty bad news. If it hasn't resolved over the last 15 months, I don't know why another couple of months would help. But maybe after the last hysteroscopy, where all the visible bits of placenta were removed, the final tiny pieces will come away.

I asked Dr D was it possible to see the placenta when the last hysteroscopy was done. She said they could be seen as yellow bits in the endometrium and this is why Dr G is so confident that he'd finally got them. But maybe the placenta that is being detected by the biopsy is microscopic and too small to see.

Dr G has also recommended I have a 'special kind' of ultrasound to have a look at the lining, which apparently shows what the hysteroscope can't. Maybe this will show why there are still bits of placenta that won't come out. It might show that they are embedded deep in the lining, which will be really bad news because then I don't know if there will be any hope of getting them out.

Dr D said we may never resolve this problem. This didn't come as a huge shock because I'd already concluded that might be the case. She also said we can't put the embryos back in while this placental tissue is there because the inflammation will absolutely stop any implantation.

So we may end up in a situation where we can't fix the uterus and we can't put the embryos back. I think if that happens, we may need to take a chance on it even though there's little chance we would succeed.

So all in all, the situation and prospects are very grim indeed. I strangely don't feel too bad about it because its nothing less than I expected anyway. And the sheer relief of finally knowing what's going on is just huge. Waiting for a phone call from Dr D for nearly three weeks has just been killing me so I'm glad its finally over.

Now at least we can get on with life and not think about IVF too much for a little while.

When I told LH about all this, he voiced something I've been thinking about too. That is, should we do another stimulated IVF cycle now and freeze all the embryos. Its a big thing to do given that a. we may already have an embryo that will become a baby, b. we may never get the chance to implant more embryos if my uterus never recovers and c. our chances of success on a stim cycle are probably about 5% at best.

Anyway, we will mull that one over for a while. The cost is the main reason not to do it. With the Medicare safety net now gone from IVF, it would cost a lot for something that may not be worthwhile for many reasons.