How Zoe (formerly know as E3) came into the world

I really need to not delay any more in documenting Zoe's birth. Already some of the details are becoming a bit hazy and I want to have a record of how it all unfolded.

As I wrote in my second last post, I was feeling lots of stinging pains in the cervix and had lots of mucous coming out. I went to bed as usual at about 11pm on Friday night.

About 12.45am, I woke up to a 'popping' feeling down below and then a sensation of wetness. I was already familiar with the wet feeling at this time of night, as the progesterone pessaries melted and come out of me. But the popping sensation was definitely different.

I got out of bed and went to the loo to check what was going on. There was a lot of dampness but the really scary thing was, it was stained pink. I knew there couldn't be any doubt this time that my waters had broken.

I tried not to panic that it might be the vasa previa veins that had ruptured, but I knew that would mean lots of red blood. This was literally like pink water, and I'd read that this is what you can see when the waters break.

I woke up LH and said 'Right, this is it, we're on.' We both got dressed, walked down stairs, I grabbed my blood glucose monitor and camera, and we were both out the door within minutes with our packed bags (they'd been waiting by the door for weeks).

By this stage, I was also feeling a fairly strong cramping sensation down low, just like a really bad period cramp. I called the hospital as we were setting off and said I thought my waters had broken and I was 36 weeks. They asked was I still feeling water leaking and I said couldn't tell because I was sitting in the car and not sure if more was leaking onto my pad.

They seemed surprised I was already on the way, and I explained about the vasa previa and short cervix, and the need for a caesarian. The midwife was very calm and matter of fact and said 'Right then, we'll see you when you get here.'

By the time we got to the hospital 15 minutes later, the cramps (which I later realised were contractions) were coming about 5 minutes apart and were really painful. Amazingly though, I told LH to leave the bags in the car because I still wasn't convinced it was the real thing!! We negotiated the car park and found our way through emergency and up to the maternity ward.

They were already organised for us by the time we got there. The midwife said 'Right, you are having a caesarian so let's get organised'.

(Below par edited later as I remembered more details...)

They took me into a birthing room, and the nurse asked me to show her my pad so she could check the waters had broken. I went to the loo, checking the pad with great trepidation. I was still worried there might be red blood from the foetal veins. There was another big gush of water and more pinkness. The nurse took one look at the pad and said 'Yes, your waters have definitey broken'.

I got undressed, put on a theatre gown and they took BP etc and hooked me up to a foetal monitor. It was the best thing in the world to see that Zoe's little heart was still beating strong at around 150 bpm. By this time, it was about 1.10am.

Pretty soon, Dr P came to have a chat to me (the locum obs I had been seeing for the last 3 weeks while Dr I was on hols). I turned out Dr I was having a night off, so Dr P would be doing the delivery. It was nice that I already knew him.

Now the contractions were coming thick and fast and really hurting like hell. I was having to breath through them to cope and I remember thinking that I was totally unprepared for them because I hadn't done any labour classes or preparation. They wheeled me down to theatre, and Dr P said 'Are you having contractions?' when it became obvious I was in lots of pain. He said 'We'd better hurry and get on with it then.'

I went from nothing to full blown labour so fast, I really think that Zoe would have been born within an hour or two had I gone through labour. I will never know, because perhaps what I was feeling was a long way off the business end of labour, but with regular really painful contractions about 5 minutes apart, she can't have been far from making her entry.

Getting the epidural/spinal block was the worst part of the whole business. I'd been scared about this part, and with good reason. The anaesthesists' assistant had me sit on the bed and bend forward and lean my head against his tummy. This was good and he held onto me tightly and encouraged me to breath through the epidural.

First, the anaesthetist swabbed me and put in a local anaesthetic. This hurt a bit but was ok. The main problem was that I was contracting really regularly by then and my legs were shaking uncontrollably through each contraction so I was worried about keeping still.

I kept thinking how it would be good when the spinal was in because it would take away the pain. I also kept telling myself that we were about to meet E3 and I wasn't mentally prepared. It just seemed that I needed a few hours to process this and get ready but there wasn't time.

First, the anaesthetist inserted the epidural needle. He said it might cause a feeling of an electric shock down my leg. It certainly did - I felt like I'd put my finger in a powerpoint, and the shock ran all the way down my left leg.

He then asked what side it was, and had another go. I got another shock, although not as bad this time, and then the anaethetist said the epidural needle is coming out (presumably leaving behind the plastic tube where the meds would be fed).

Finally it was done, and I started to lose sensation in my legs and got some blessed relief from the pain of the contractions, which were really bad by this point. They then wheeled me into theatre to get ready. LH was taken away at this stage (he'd been there through the epidural) while they got me ready for the operation.

LH came back in after a little while, decked out in his theatre gear, and we got started. I didn't feel anything, and there just seemed to be a lot of rummaging around, and pulling, with Dr P and his assistant talking about manouvering Zoe out of me. Within what felt like about 10 mins but was probably less, they pulled her out.

They said we could have a look at her, and lowered the drapes. LH could see over the top, but nobody seemed to realise that part of the drapes was obscuring my vision so I couldn't actually see her. Someone finally pulled them down further, and there she was, covered in blood and white vernix and looking just wonderful. I immediately said 'It's a girl!' and started to cry.

LH said later he couldn't work out whether she was a boy or girl because he so wanted a girl he thought he would get it wrong.

Neither of us can remember exactly when she first cried but it wasn't long after they hauled her out. Then it was off to the paediatrician sitting in the corner to have a look at her.

Fortunately, she was absolutely perfect and well with APGAR scores of 9 and 9 at 1 and 5 minutes, which was absolutely brilliant. She was soon wrapped in a blanket and back with me to hold. The feeling of having her there beside me, looking into her little face, was indescribable. I was so overwhelmed with relief that she was alive and well and we had a little girl. The tears didn't stop and LH was the same.

The surgical assistant took quite a few really wonderful photos of me holding her while I was on the table, which we sent to all the family. I just look so unbelievably happy in them.

I think the sheer relief of her being alive and surviving her birth overrode the intense happiness we felt and it is a moment I will remember forever.

Next post - Zoe's first day.