LH is here because its a public holiday so we went shopping this morning, which helped to take my mind off this cycle. The only way I can really cope with this wait is to keep pushing thoughts of the pregnancy test and aftermath out of my head.
I woke up at 3am last night, I guess because of stress. Hopefully that won't happen every night for the next 10 days. Its very rare that any event, no matter how stressful, affects my sleep. I can't help but wondering if everything is ok in my uterus. I keep telling myself that the endometrial biopsy during the last cycle came back normal, and there wasn't any odd stuff on the ultrasound but still I feel uneasy.
Its the difficult embryo transfer that did it. I can't work out why it was so hard for the catheter to pass through my cervix, when its been fine very other time. I did start to wonder if it had anything to do with the pap smear I had two weeks ago. Maybe there was some dried blood or something that made it hard to push through. My worst fear is that I've got some sort of scarring around my cervix and that caused my period to stop as well. But that would mean something had to happen between my last period and now and I can't think what that could be other than the pap smear.
Anyway, useless to speculate. The doctor, when she finally did get the catheter in, said the placement was 'perfect'. She told me to watch out for the flash of light on the screen that would be the embryo going in, and I could see it spraying into my uterus. Let's hope it landed in a nice spot.
At the moment, I feel that its unlikely this cycle will work and then its all over for us. Maybe I'll be more positive as the days go by.
2 comments:
Hi,
I think it's more likely that the position of your uterus at the time of the transfer was affecting the catheder than scarring of the cervix. Also, if AF had started and was held back by a scarred/blocked cervix, the broken down tissue would have shown on the US.
It can be something as simple as whether your bladder is full or empty at the time of the transfer that determines the position of you uterus and the type of catheder required (its angle).
During my first transfer the doctor had the same problem, so it doesn't seem to be that uncommon.
Try to relax - there's absolutely nothing you can do at the moment, and sometimes that's a good thing :-)
Have a great week ahead -
J.
Thanks J for your kind words. I think you're right. I've got a retroverted uterus so that makes it a bit harder to get the catheter in and my bladder was very full! Am feeling a little more hopeful today.
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